• me: *on my phone*
  • grandma: do you ever put that thing down?
  • me: *puts phone down*
  • me: why did you ruin the economy?


boys? you mean sex toys that are rude and don’t even vibrate? no thank u

(via carvingcastles)


my love and hate for twitter is so real


do you ever keep tabs open thinking “eh i’ll get to that later” and then five weeks pass and you still haven’t fucking done anything with it

(Source: toewsnkane, via itwasgood-neverlookingdown)


He wasn’t good enough for her.


contestant on singing talent show: i quit my job for this, dropped out of school, I left it all… just for this moment

me: nobody asked you to do that though

(via ernbarassing)